Monday, April 18, 2011

This broken place- Right where you're standing.

  So these days I sort of feel like I am swimming in sadness. Chalk it up to two moves in 8 months and I just can't handle it. BUT the good side is that I am not alone and my best friends are walking through it with me. This is exceedingly good. Also, this time I know how to be sad. It takes time to learn that you know.
  So  I'm walking around in the world today and I am thinking how great the birds and all the new flowers are. Everything is so new and good and beautiful in spring. But at the same time I am thinking of my friends and their sick babies and how it's so broken down here. I'd really like to go up There. Take a break. And then come back down if that's what He wanted. But I'm here because that's where He wants me for now.
   The Psalmists repeatedly talks about putting his HOPE in the Lord.  I am learning slowly that you can't really put your HOPE in anything else because everything else is = broken.  Especially ME.
So when I put my hope in the bag of chocolate chips- it fails.
   when I put my hope in the Real Simple magazine- FAIL.
   when I put my hope in the new creation I made for dinner- FAIL!
So it's a little trial and error at this point.
   But I learn. Slowly.


.